This Phonetic Labyrinth

Dearest creature [ˈkriːʧər] in creation [kriˈeɪʃən],
Studying English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse.
Sounds like corpse [kɔːrps], corps [kɔːr], horse [hɔːrs], and worse [wɜːrs] —
It will keep you, Susy [ˈsuːzi], busy [ˈbɪzi],
Make your head [hed] with heat [hiːt] grow dizzy.
Tear [tɪə] in eye, your dress you’ll tear [teə] —
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer [preə]:
Pray [preɪ] console your loving poet,
Make my coat look new [njuː], dear, sew [soʊ] it!

Just compare heart [hɑːt], beard [bɪəd], and heard [hɜːd],
Dies [daɪz] and diet [ˈdaɪət], lord [lɔːrd] and word [wɜːrd],
Sword [sɔːrd] and sward [swɔːrd], retain [rɪˈteɪn] and Britain [ˈbrɪtən]
(Mind the latter, how it’s written).
Made [meɪd] has not the sound of bade [bæd ‖ beɪd];
Say [seɪ] – said [sed], pay [peɪ] – paid [peɪd], laid [leɪd], but plaid [plæd].
Now I surely will not plague [pleɪɡ] you
With such words as vague [veɪɡ] and ague [ˈeɪɡjuː].
But be careful how you speak [spiːk]:
Say break [breɪk] and steak [steɪk], but bleak [bliːk] and streak [striːk].

Previous [ˈpriːviəs], precious [ˈpreʃəs], fuchsia [ˈfjuːʃə], via [ˈvaɪə ‖ ˈviːə];
Pipe [paɪp], snipe [snaɪp], recipe [ˈresɪpi] and choir [ˈkwaɪə];
Cloven [ˈkloʊvən], oven [ˈʌvən]; how [haʊ] and low [loʊ];
Script [skrɪpt], receipt [rɪˈsiːt]; shoe [ʃuː], poem [ˈpoʊɪm], toe [toʊ].
Hear me say, devoid of trickery [ˈtrɪkəri]:
Daughter [ˈdɔːtər], laughter [ˈlɑːftər] and Terpsichore [tɜːpˈsɪkəri];
Typhoid [ˈtaɪfɔɪd], measles [ˈmiːzəlz], topsails [ˈtɒpseɪlz], aisles [aɪlz];
Exiles [ˈeksaɪlz], similes [ˈsɪmɪliz], reviles [rɪˈvaɪlz];
Wholly [ˈhoʊl.li], holly [ˈhɒli], signal [ˈsɪgnəl], signing [ˈsaɪnɪŋ];
Thames [temz], examining [ɪɡˈzæmɪnɪŋ], combining [kəmˈbaɪnɪŋ].

Scholar [ˈskɒlər], vicar [ˈvɪkər] and cigar [sɪˈɡɑːr];
Solar [ˈsoʊlər], mica [ˈmaɪkər], war [wɔːr] and far [fɑːr].
From desire [dɪˈzaɪə] to desirable [dɪˈzaɪərəbəl], admirable [ˈædmərəbəl] from admire [ədˈmaɪə].
Lumber [ˈlʌmbər], plumber [ˈplʌmər]; bier [bɪə] but brier [ˈbraɪə];
Chatham [ˈʧætəm], brougham [ˈbruːəm]; renown [rɪˈnaʊn] but known [noʊn],
From knowledge [ˈnɒlɪʤ]; done [dʌn], but gone [ɡɒn] and tone [toʊn];
One [wʌn], anemone [əˈneməni]; Balmoral [bælˈmɒrəl];
Kitchen [ˈkɪʧɪn], lichen [ˈlaɪkən]; laundry [ˈlɔːndri], laurel [ˈlɒrəl];
Gertrude [ˈɡɜːtruːd], German [ˈʤɜːrmən]; wind [wɪnd] and mind [maɪnd].
Scene [siːn], Melpomene [melˈpɒmɪniː], mankind [ˌmænˈkaɪnd];
Tortoise [ˈtɔːrtəs], turquoise [ˈtɜːrkwɔɪz], chamois-leather [ˈʃæmwɑː ˌleðər];
Reading [ˈredɪŋ], reading [ˈriːdɪŋ], heathen [ˈhiːðən], heather [ˈheðər].

This phonetic labyrinth
Gives moss [mɒs], gross [ɡroʊs], brook [brʊk], brooch [broʊʧ], ninth [naɪnθ] and plinth [plɪnθ].
Billet [ˈbɪlɪt] does not end like ballet [ˈbæleɪ ‖ bæˈleɪ],
Bouquet [boʊˈkeɪ ‖ buːˈkeɪ], wallet [ˈwɒlɪt], mallet [ˈmælɪt], chalet [ˈʃæleɪ ‖ ʃæˈleɪ].
Blood [blʌd] and flood [flʌd] are not like food [fuːd],
Nor is mould [moʊld] like would [wʊd] and should [ʃʊd].
Banquet [ˈbæŋkwɪt] is not nearly parquet [ˈpɑːkeɪ ‖ pɑːrˈkeɪ],
Which is said to rhyme with “darky [ˈdɑːrki].”
Viscous [ˈvɪskəs], viscount [ˈvaɪkaʊnt], load [loʊd] and broad [brɔːd];
Toward [təˈwɔːd ‖ twɔːrd], to forward [ˈfɔːrwərd], to reward [rɪˈwɔːrd].

And your pronunciation’s O.K.,
When you say correctly croquet [ˈkrəʊkeɪ ‖ kroʊˈkeɪ];
Rounded [ˈraʊndɪd], wounded [ˈwuːndɪd]; grieve [ɡriːv] and sieve [sɪv];
Friend [frend] and fiend [fiːnd]; alive [əˈlaɪv] and live [lɪv];
Liberty [ˈlɪbəti], library [ˈlaɪbrəri], heave [hiːv] and heaven [ˈhevən];
Rachel [ˈreɪʧəl], ache [eɪk], moustache [məˈstɑːʃ]; eleven [ɪˈlevən].
We say hallowed [ˈhæloʊd], but allowed [əˈlaʊd];
People [ˈpiːpəl], leopard [ˈlepərd]; towed [toʊd] but vowed [vaʊd].

Mark the differences, moreover [mɔːrˈoʊvər],
Twixt mover [ˈmuːvər], plover [ˈplʌvər], Dover [ˈdəʊvə];
Leeches [ˈliːʧɪs], breeches [ˈbrɪʧɪz]; wise [waɪz], precise [prɪˈsaɪs];
Chalice [ˈʧælɪs], but police [pəˈliːs] and lice [laɪs];
Camel [ˈkæməl], constable [ˈkʌnstəbəl], unstable [ʌnˈsteɪbəl];
Principle [ˈprɪnsɪpəl], disciple [dɪˈsaɪpəl]; label [ˈleɪbəl];
Petal [ˈpetl], penal [ˈpiːnl] and canal [kəˈnæl];
Wait [weɪt], surmise [sərˈmaɪz], plait [plæt], promise [ˈprɒmɪs], pal [pæl].
Suit [sjuːt], suite [swiːt], ruin [ˈruːɪn]; circuit [ˈsɜːrkɪt], conduit [ˈkɒndɪt ‖ ˈkɒndjuɪt]
Rhyme with “shirk it” and “beyond it.”
But it’s very hard to tell,
Why it’s pall [pɔːl], mall [mɔːl], but Pall Mall [pæl mæl].

Muscle [ˈmʌsəl], muscular [ˈmʌskjʊlər]; gaol [ʤeɪl]; iron [ˈaɪərn];
Timber [ˈtɪmbər], climber [ˈklaɪmər]; bullion [ˈbʊljən], lion [ˈlaɪən];
Worm [wɜːrm] and storm [stɔːrm]; chaise [ʃeɪz], chaos [ˈkeɪ.ɒs], chair [ʧeə];
Senator [ˈsenətər], spectator [spekˈteɪtə ‖ ˈspekteɪtər], mayor [meə ‖ ˈmeɪər].
Ivy [ˈaɪvi], privy [ˈprɪvi]; famous [ˈfeɪməs]; clamour [ˈklæmər]
And enamour [ɪˈnæmər] rhyme with hammer [ˈhæmər].

Pussy [ˈpʊsi], hussy [ˈhʌsi] and possess [pəˈzes];
desert [ˈdezərt ‖ dɪˈzɜːrt], but dessert [dɪˈzɜːrt], address [əˈdres].
Golf [ɡɒlf], wolf [wʊlf]; countenance [ˈkaʊntɪnəns]; lieutenants [lefˈtenənts ‖ luːˈtenənts]
Hoist , in lieu [ljuː] of flags, left pennants [ˈpenənts].
River [ˈrɪvər], rival [ˈraɪvəl]; tomb [tuːm], bomb [bɒm], comb [koʊm];
Doll [dɒl] and roll [roʊl] and some [sʌm] and home [hoʊm].
Stranger [ˈstreɪnʤər] does not rhyme with anger [ˈæŋɡər],
Neither does devour [dɪˈvaʊə] with clangour [ˈklæŋər].
Soul [soʊl] but foul [faʊl], and gaunt [ɡɔːnt], but aunt [ɑːnt];
Font [fɒnt], front [frʌnt], wont [wəʊnt ‖ wɒːnt], want [wɒnt], grand [grænd] and grant [grɑːnt].

Shoes [ʃuːz], goes [ɡoʊz], does [dʌz]. Now first say finger [ˈfɪŋɡər],
And then singer [ˈsɪŋər], ginger [ˈʤɪnʤər], linger [ˈlɪŋɡər].
Real [rɪəl], zeal [ziːl]; mauve [moʊv], gauze [ɡɔːz] and gauge [ɡeɪʤ];
Marriage [ˈmærɪʤ], foliage [ˈfoʊli.ɪʤ], mirage [ˈmɪrɑːʒ] and age [eɪʤ].
Query [ˈkwɪəri] does not rhyme with very [ˈveri],
Nor does fury [ˈfjʊəri] sound like bury [ˈberi].
Dost [dʌst], lost [lɒst], post [poʊst] and doth [dʌθ], cloth [klɒθ], loth [loʊθ];
Job [ʤoʊb], job [ʤɒb]; blossom [ˈblɒsəm], bosom [ˈbʊzəm], oath [oʊð].
Though the difference seems little,
We say actual [ˈækʧuəl] but victual [ˈvɪtl].

Seat [siːt], sweat [swet]; chaste [ʧeɪst], caste [kɑːst]; Leigh [liː], eight [eɪt], height [haɪt];
Put [pʊt], nut [nʌt]; granite [ˈɡrænɪt] but unite [juːˈnaɪt].
Reefer [ˈriːfər] does not rhyme with deafer [ˈdefər].
Feoffer [ˈfefər] does, and zephyr [ˈzefər], heifer [ˈhefər].
Dull [dʌl], bull [bʊl]; Geoffrey [ˈʤefri], George [ʤɔːrʤ]; ate [eɪt], late [leɪt];
Hint [hɪnt], pint [paɪnt]; senate [ˈsenɪt], but sedate [sɪˈdeɪt];
Scenic [ˈsiːnɪk], Arabic [ˈærəbɪk], pacific [pəˈsɪfɪk];
Science [ˈsaɪəns], conscience [ˈkɒnʃəns], scientific [ˌsaɪənˈtɪfɪk];
Tour [tʊə], but our [aʊə], and succour [ˈsʌkər], four [fɔːr];
Core [kɔːr] provides a rhyme for door [dɔːr].
Gas [ɡæs], alas [əˈlæs] and Arkansas [ˈɑːkənsɒːr].
Sea [siː], idea [aɪˈdɪə], guinea [ˈɡɪni], area [ˈeəriə].
Psalm [sɑːm], but malaria [məˈleəriə];
Youth [juːθ], south [saʊθ], southern [ˈsʌðərn]; cleanse [klenz], but clean [kliːn];
Doctrine [ˈdɒktrɪn], turpentine [ˈtɜːrpəntaɪn], marine [məˈriːn],
Compare alien [ˈeɪliən] with Italian [ɪˈtæliən],
Dandelion [ˈdændəlaɪən] with battalion [bəˈtæljən].
Sally [ˈsæli] with ally [ˈælaɪ ‖ əˈlaɪ]; yea [jeɪ], ye [jiː] —
Eye [aɪ], I [aɪ], ay [eɪ], aye [aɪ], whey [weɪ], key [kiː], quay [kiː]!

Say aver [əˈvɜːr], but ever [ˈevər], fever [ˈfiːvər],
Neither [ˈnaɪðə ‖ ˈniːðər], leisure [ˈleʒə ‖ ˈliːzər], skein [skeɪn], receiver [rɪˈsiːvər],
Never guess — it’s not safe.
We say calves [kɑːvz], valves [vælvz], half [hɑːf], but Ralf [rɑːlf].
Heron [ˈherən], granary [ˈɡrænəri], canary [kəˈneəri];
Crevice [ˈkrevɪs] and device [dɪˈvaɪs] and eyrie [ˈɪəri ‖ ˈeəri ‖ ˈaɪəri];
Face [feɪs] but preface [ˈprefɪs], but efface [ɪˈfeɪs];
Phlegm [flem], phlegmatic [fleɡˈmætɪk]; ass [æs], glass [ɡlɑːs], bass [beɪs ‖ bæs];
Large [lɑːʤ], but target [ˈtɑːɡɪt]; gin [ʤɪn], give [ɡɪv], verging [ˈvɜːrʤɪŋ];
Ought [ɔːt], out [aʊt], joust [ʤaʊst] and scour [skaʊə], scourging [ˈskɜːrʤɪŋ].
Ear [ɪə], earn [ɜːrn]; and wear [weə] and tear [teə ‖ tɪə]
Do not rhyme with “here [hɪə]” and “there [ðeə ‖ ðər]” but “ere [eə].”

Seven [ˈsevən] is right, but so is even [ˈiːvən],
Hyphen [ˈhaɪfən], roughen [ˈrʌfən], nephew [ˈnefjuː], Stephen [ˈstiːvən];
Monkey [ˈmʌŋki], donkey [ˈdɒŋki], clerk [klɑːrk] and jerk [ʤɜːrk];
Asp [æsp], grasp [ɡrɑːsp], wasp [wɒsp]; and cork [kɔːrk] and work [wɜːrk].

Pronunciation — think of Psyche —
Is a paling, stout and spiky,
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing “groats” and saying “grits.”
It’s a dark abyss, or tunnel [ˈtʌnl],
Strewn with stones, like rowlock [ˈrɒlək ‖ ruːlɒk], gunwale [ˈɡʌnl];
Islington [ˈɪzlɪŋtən] and Isle [aɪl] of Wight;
Housewife [ˈhaʊs.waɪf], verdict [ˈvɜːrdɪkt] and indict [ɪnˈdaɪt].

Don’t you think so, reader, rather [ˈrɑːðər]
Saying lather [ˈlɑːðər ‖ ˈlæðər], bather [ˈbeɪðər], father [ˈfɑːðər]?
Finally, which rhymes with “enough [ɪˈnʌf]” —
Though [ðoʊ], through [θruː], plough [plaʊ], cough [kɒf], hough [hɒk],
Or tough [tʌf]?
Hiccough [ˈhɪkʌp] has the sound of “cup [kʌp].”
My advice is — give it up!!!